Tell Us About Yourself and What the DAB Means To You

Ran out of Self..
I need help. I'm married to a man that is emotionally disconnected..we are only married 3.5 yrs.I want to stay true to my commitment I made to the Lord, but it's too hard for me alone...When I try to discuss matters of concern, my husband gets defensive/angry and then we don't talk for weeks...I'm so sad...not sure how to stay in this situation. a lot of tears....
Donna 12/30/2011 12:09

Replies:
Calico 12/30/2011 14:08
Oh Donna... :-(

Hugs to you. I can tell you that you're in the right spot. There are many DAB sisters and brothers here, who've been or who are right where you are. Their connecting-up to this family of support and care has changed many a life. Several DAB brothers and sister whom I know will add their support here, I am sure of it. Let us help you carry the heaviness of it, so that you are not burdened alone, Donna.

You've taken a step to pour out your sadness of heart, and that is a brave thing. I hope to encourage you to consider a few things:

1. - We can simply listen, if you should want to pour out more. It's your thread, Donna; often the writing-out of things can be a way of processing-through the matters that one is experiencing in heart and mind. This thread can be for you a way of doing that.

2. - If you do decide to write-out whatever is in heart and mind, perhaps consider too that the journaling might also be a way of "bench-marking." That is, even though today is Dec. 30th 2011 and you are currently found inside the place of the sadness you're experiencing, perhaps in the coming days and weeks you'll be able to return here and reflect on the ways that the Spirit of Christ has worked to free you from that place, while journeying alongside the community of brothers and sisters who will travel with you.

3. - There is also the Women's Forum too. You may recall from the daily DAB podcast that Brian has often spoken of the ways that men can help men and women can help women, and the safety of that is also an option for you. Still, my personal perspective is that I often also think that men and women journeying together through particular relational issues can also be of good value. The distinct and unique voice that you express here on your thread can draw-out things from the hearts of women who are in similar situations. And, the power of your woman's perspective that you share here may also profoundly impact the lives of the men who come to read the thread; both in the here-and-now and any future weeks/months wherein anyone might stumble across the writings on the thread. There are several threads like this on DAB, regarding similar matters of the heart.

All of that said, I hope that I can encourage you to come back to your thread. Spend some time thinking and praying about it, and say more of your heart wants to say. We will listen, Donna.

Very much praying WITH you,

Tom
wesrman 12/30/2011 14:46
Nice to meet you Donna. I hope things start to get better for you.
Heidi 12/31/2011 00:31
Donna,

You are not alone. God is with you and he has provided you with people in his family that love you and want to help you. I am praying for you.

Heidi
tina 12/31/2011 20:15
Keep you focus on God..he is your first love. ASK HIM to mold you, to change you, to shape you into P31 wife and mother. As you begin to focus on God and God alone..let him take care of your husband, have Faith but mostly love him. Especially when he dosnt deserve it..lol. Smith Wigglesworth would have never became the man he was without his wife. He was mean and hateful to her, even locked her out of the house for goin to Bible studies. and when he would unlock the door and find his sleeping wife wrapped up in a blanket from the car..she would say " Now what would be wonnderful husband like for breakfast?" And he was able to raise people from the dead with the Holy Spirit. She knew one of the most important things you need to remember as a wife.." they will know them by the way they love." god Bless you.. and remember, Satan hate happy marriages..they raise happy kids and grand kids etc..so never forget who the enemy really is.
JDan 01/01/2012 10:16
Donna, thank you for sharing a little piece of your heart with us. I have been a part of this DAB community since August '11 and I know there are loving and caring people here as is evidenced by brother Tom's post above.
I have found in relational issue such as what you are passing through now, that the only one we can really expect to change is ourselves. And this is a great place to start doing just that. I have learned that a lot of my relational issues with others including my spouse have to do with ME.
As they say it all comes down to attitude and your attitude determines your altitude. As I learn to love others as Christ has loved me I tend not to get offended as easily. And as I come to realize that there are other factors at work in any given situation I can understand and at least accept the situation at hand. People tend to be controlled by what has happened in their past. So consider your spouses anger and disengagement may not be necessarily directed at you but it may have it's roots in his own past.
I hope this will help you in your struggles but I so know that as to listen to DAB and let it minister to your heart you will change and become a different person in Christ. I find the greatest challenge is in focusing on what Brian is reading. My mind tends to wander and there are so many distraction that the enemy can use to cause me not to listen carefully. I have found that it helps to get a version of the Bible that Brian is reading from www.biblegateway.com and read along with him. It helps me keep focused on what is being read.
So again Welcome to the DAB community and I pray that this year you will experience the wonder of God's Word in a new and exciting way. And no matter what the outcome of your current situation just KNOW that God loves YOU in a unique and special way.
God Bless Donna as she travels through the Bible this year and minister to her heart what You would say to her. Change her Lord in Jesus Name and change her husband too Lord I know how Your Holy Spirit can work in our hearts and that nothing is impossible for You. In Jesus name Amen.
God bless you Donna and welcome to the DAB community we love you in Christ Jesus our Lord.
JD
impetuousaloof saleheptathlon 07/17/2023 19:01
You may recall from the daily DAB podcast that Brian has often spoken of the ways that men can help men and women can help women https://moto-x3m.io/